An Industry with a 70% Fail Rate

At the moment, 7 out of 10 kids quit participating in athletics by the age of 13. There are not too many industries that would survive with a 70% fail rate but the youth sport model in America is in no real threat of collapse. On any given week, you can find a tournament to compete in, a team to try out for, or receive specialized instruction at a camp or clinic. Gone are the days of riding bikes with friends, shooting hoops in the park, or playing street hockey with kids in the neighborhood. Rather, it seems these youngsters are in a never ending loop of structured activities which prevents kids from being just that: KIDS!

In the moment, I do not foresee much changing nationally in regards to the youth sport model but it doesn't mean we shouldn't try to make the experience better for the kids in our lives. When you ask kids why they stop playing sports, the number one reason given is that they just aren't fun anymore. Below I have outlined six areas that frustrate kids when they are playing and things we can avoid as parents/coaches/teachers to ensure that we are not the cause of their dissatisfaction!

1. Stop coaching your child from the sidelines. There is not a coach in the world that wants every parent in the crowd shouting instructions. It is hard enough to get the messaging across when it comes from one or two voices, let alone a sideline full of self-appointed coaches. Find coaches that you trust and then get out of the way and let them do their job!
2. Stop yelling instructions while the play is on. All coaches want their athletes to think and react on the fly. It is unconscious thought, the “thinking without thinking” that differentiates high level skill acquisition from the beginner. While you yell direction while play is going on, the athlete may shift their focus from the task and look to you for guidance. This distraction will hinder performance, not enhance it. One more thing, there is a good chance they don't hear you anyway! 
3. Stop disrespecting officials (This includes you Eagles fan!) Not only is this impolite and poor behavior, it shifts the focus from the internal to the external. If you are saying things like, "The ref cost you the game" then the child thinks whatever they did was acceptable that day. It wasn't the three turnovers or errors, it was the ref who led to the defeat. This is a poor lesson for a kid to learn!
4. Stop questioning the coach. During these moments of criticism, your child will begin to devalue their coaches thoughts and opinions because there mommy and daddy do. If you want your child to have a good attitude and show great effort in everything they do, disrespecting the coach will not help aid in that department. If there is an issue with the coach, speak to them privately and not in front of your child. 
5. Stop commenting on teammates' play or comparing your child to others. You and your child will have a much better sports experience if you stop comparing your child to their fellow athletes. 
6. Stop using the ride home as a “teaching moment”. After competition, emotions can be quite high. If you or your child is emotionally charged, it is not wise to try to discuss certain matters associated with whatever caused the emotion. Give the kid some time to process things and if they want to talk, then talk. If they don't give them space. Remember, you are there to support your child so do what best serves them!